Strong Relationships Make for Success

Interpersonal competence is one of the keys to personal and professional success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success.  If you want to become interpersonally competent you need to do three things.  1) Get to know yourself.  Use this self knowledge to better understand and communicate with others.  2) Build solid, long term, mutually beneficial relationships with the important people in your life.  3) Resolve conflict positively.  Use conflict as an opportunity to strengthen your relationships.

Mike Litman is a friend mine and all around good guy.  He’s a great coach who has taught me a lot about the business of coaching.  Mike gave me a great tip on building my database – run solo ads on sites that have a large number of subscribers.  Last week I mentioned to him that I was going to run a solo ad on on Wednesday.

I made an offer in the ad, and because you read this blog, you are important to me, I’m posting that offer here.  I hope you take advantage of it.  Go to: to claim the free gifts I offered on this ad.

Late Wednesday afternoon, I got an email from Mike that said, “What results did you get from your ad?”  This email is a fine example of Mike’s interpersonal competence.  He did something very simple, but that few people ever take the time to do.  He remembered that I was doing something important for me last Wednesday (running a solo ad to build my database).  He also took the time to send me an email asking how things went.

Even though we have a pretty strong relationship, Mike’s email made it stronger.  By taking a few minutes to inquire about something important to me, Mike showed me that I am an important person to him.  He used his common sense to strengthen our relationship.

The next time Mike is doing something important, I’ll be sure to be in touch – and I’ll be willing to help him in any way I can.  That’s what a mutually beneficial relationship is all about.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are interpersonally competent.  Interpersonally competent people build and maintain solid, long term, mutually beneficial relationships with the important people in their lives.  Maintaining strong relationships requires a bit of thought and a willingness to reach out to other people – especially when they are involved with something important.  My friend Mike Litman provided a great example of this when he sent me a brief email asking me about the results of a database building ad I ran the other day.  He didn’t have to, but he did, because he wanted me to know that he values our relationship.  Who are the people you need to get in touch with?  Send them an email asking how they are doing.  You’ll be strengthening your relationships – something interpersonally competent people make a habit of doing.

That’s my take on staying in touch with the people in your life.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.


Print Friendly, PDF & Email


  1. Mohammed Baidoo says:

    I really like your practical examples. In fact,you have touched my heart this afternoon,in Ghana,to do even more. For the sky is always our limit

  2. So True…and a bizarre coincidence….As I have contacted some business contacts, which whom I have worked with in the past, succesfully… but have been out of touch for a long while, due to being based and working in two differnt continents and involed in different projects.
    I sent them e-mails ( which they did not reply to my last e-mail sent out around 6 months ago)
    I was very pleased when I saw their names in my inbox….
    After reding 3 seperate e-mails I was delighted when they all took some time, to respond possitively, practically and in a friendly demeanor. And It felt gratifying for the first time, As I have currently been looking for employment, for over 5 months now and no news from any of some inportant contacts….SO this is as you say “To build solid long term mutually beneficial relationships” these e-mail contacts are extremely important clients, I felt a lot more relaxed and satisfied with myself, I am a ‘happy bunny’ today….It was interesting reading something which actually happened just minutes earlier and felt soooo goood!! Have a terrific week…. MIKI

Speak Your Mind


This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.