I have found that little things make for strong relationships. In other words, sweat the small stuff because it’s the small stuff that will help you build and maintain strong, lasting, mutually beneficial relationships with the people who can help you create the life and career success you want and deserve.
A couple of years ago, I had an opportunity to preview a great DVD on relationship building called, Little Things Mean a Lot. The DVD is based on the work of Brigid Moynahan, founder of The Next Level Inc. She is a well-known and highly recognized speaker and trainer.
Ms. Moynahan says that when it comes to relationships, it’s important to sweat the small stuff. She says that we send micro-messages in all of our interactions with other people. Micro-messages are the signals we send to one another through our behavior. While micro-messages are often small, their impact can be enormous.
Micro-messages can help or hinder your relationship-building efforts. Micro-affirmations help you build and maintain strong relationships. Micro-inequities hinder your ability to build and maintain strong relationships.
These are important concepts that deserve a closer look.
Not surprisingly, micro-affirmations are micro-messages that we send to other people that cause them to feel valued, included, or encouraged.
Micro-inequities are micro-messages that we send to other people that cause them to feel devalued, slighted, discouraged or excluded.
Here’s some great career advice. Consciously avoid micro-inequities and consciously send micro-affirmations.
Ms. Moynahan puts a diversity spin on her work. While I agree that moving from an organizational culture based on micro-inequities to one based on micro-affirmations will build a more inclusive – and thereby productive and profitable – organization, I also believe there are life and career success lessons to be learned here.
Ask yourself, “When do I feel excluded, disrespected and devalued?” In most of these cases, you have been the recipient of a micro-inequity. The way you feel when you experience a micro-inequity is the way others are likely to feel when you engage in micro-inequity behavior. That means you should refrain from using these behaviors in your interactions with others.
Then do just the opposite. Ask yourself, “When do I feel included, respected and valued?” In most of these cases, you will have been the recipient of a micro-affirmation. Work hard to incorporate behaviors that are micro-affirmations into your daily interactions with others.
In short, when you focus on sending micro-affirmations and avoiding micro-inequities, you will be better able to build solid, lasting relationships with the people in your life. And strong relationships are an important key to your personal and professional success.
The common sense career success point here is simple. Successful people are competent in four areas: 1) creating positive personal impact; 2) consistent high performance; 3) dynamic communication; and 4) interpersonal competence. Interpersonally competent people build strong relationships with the important people in their lives. They follow the career advice in Tweet 123 in Success Tweets. “Use every social interaction to build and strengthen relationships. Strong relationships are your ticket to success.” Build and strengthen relationships by sweating the small stuff. Focus sending positive micro messages – the small things that show another person that you value him or her. Avoid “micro-inequities” – behaviors that demean people in small ways. Instead, focus on “micro-affirmations” – behaviors that encourage others and build their self-esteem.
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