I am doing a talk on self-confidence at a local bank tomorrow. Whenever I do this talk I am reminded of an article I read a couple of years ago entitled “Addicted to Distraction.” The author pointed out that the internet makes it easy for us to get distracted and procrastinate. “We willingly accept the loss of concentration and focus, the division of our thoughts, in return for the wealth of compelling – or at least – diverting information we receive.”
This article highlights one of the points I make with audiences when I am speaking about self-confidence. Members of my career mentoring site will tell you that I believe that fear saps your self-confidence – and that procrastination is the physical manifestation of fear. Often we procrastinate when it comes to important tasks because we’re afraid – usually of failing, getting criticized or rejected. The internet makes it easy to procrastinate because of its ability to distract us, to enable us to lose concentration and focus. I believe that our addiction to distraction often has its roots in our fears.
Fear often manifests itself as procrastination. Most people fear failure, criticism and rejection. It’s only normal. We all want to feel good about ourselves. Failure, criticism and rejection are not pleasant experiences. They lower our self-esteem and make us feel bad about ourselves, so we often avoid doing things that we think might lead to failure, criticism or rejection.
But failure, criticism and rejection provide you with the opportunity to grow and develop. You can’t take failure, criticism and rejection personally. Failure, criticism and rejection are outcomes. They are a result of things you have done. They are not who you are.
We all make mistakes and fail on occasion. We all do things that cause others to criticize or reject us. This doesn’t mean that we are failures as people. It means that we have made some poor choices and have done some dumb things.
Failure, criticism and rejection provide the opportunity to start over – hopefully a little smarter. Buckminster Fuller once said, “Whatever humans have learned had to be learned as a consequence of trial and error experience. Humans have learned only through mistakes.” I agree.
Fear leads to procrastination. Distractions make it easy to procrastinate – with the internet being the great enabler.
If you want to finish 2016 strong and make 20176 your best year ever, you’ve got to be willing to focus on your goals and do what’s necessary to reach them. You can’t let procrastination, distractions and fear paralyze you.
So when you find yourself procrastinating or being distracted by following links on the internet, stop and ask yourself a simple question: “What am I afraid of here?” Identifying your fear is the first step in overcoming it. Overcoming your fears will build your self-confidence and help you create the successful life and career you want and deserve.
Your career mentor,
Bud
PS: I write this blog to help people create the life and career success they want and deserve. Now I’m going one step further. I’ve created a membership site in which I’ve pulled together my best thoughts on success. And, as a reader of this blog, you can become a member for free. Just go to https://budbilanich.com/join to claim your free membership. You’ll be joining a vibrant and growing community of success minded professionals. I hope to see you there.
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